I’m back!!

May 13, 2015

It’s clearly been awhile since I’ve blogged, but I’m back and committed to keep writing. I even have a few posts ready in the pipeline to post, but haven’t done so yet. I’m hoping my musings about motherhood are relatable, funny, and will maybe even brighten your day.

After a long brutal winter, spring has finally arrived. In fact, some of these past few days have actually felt quite a lot more like summer. I’m in my glory. I enjoy hot, steamy weather. I’ll take that any day over the snow and cold. Since the nice weather is here, the kids and I have been soaking it up at local playgrounds and I’m getting some extra exercise jogging with them around the lake.

As I gear up for some new posts, I’d love to hear about what you’d like to see me write about. For an upcoming post, I talk about my new favorite exercise regime and how it’s changed my perspective on my body image. Send me an email, or comment below and I’ll put it on my list of topics.

I’m also going to be writing parenting articles for Care.com, so be sure to check out my work. I’ll link to it through here, but also follow me on twitter @bostonwriterrsr.
Until next post….

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Power of Positive

July 3, 2013

I’ve been thinking a lot about kindness & judgment lately: Kindness to ourselves and kindness to others. Two blog posts I read recently really struck a chord with me.

The first, by Momastery Blogger Glennon Melton, spoke about criticism vs. cruelty when people judge your writing. One of my biggest fears regarding sharing my blog had to do with just that – the thoughts that others would have about what I have to say. Is my writing horrible? Do I share too much personal info? What will people think about what I have to say? Will they judge me?

The second blog, which I came across via a friend’s Facebook newsfeed had to do with a mother’s own body perception and what it does to your children when a mother calls herself fat.

Sadly, I am one of the worst offenders I know as of late, but after reading that blog, I have vowed to stop – if not for my own self-worth, for that of my daughter’s. In my heart of hearts, I know I’m not fat, but I would be lying if when I look at my post-pregnancy body I don’t think of a million ways I’d like it to look different.  But I’ve vowed to stop the self-criticism and I ask other mothers to take a pledge to do the same.

What is it about women that we have to criticize ourselves? If we make a mistake, we call ourselves idiots or morons. We blame it on hormones or lack of sleep. But we aren’t perfect. And you know what? That’s OK. Imperfection is what makes each of us unique and special. Some people’s strengths help other people’s weaknesses and when we help each other, we become kind. And I like kindness.

So I urge you mothers, women, and anyone reading this blog, the next time you think to criticize yourself, fight back that urge with a positive thought or comment about you instead. I’m going to try it. Let’s see what happens. Feel free to share your experiences with me!

And in other news…

My little Vinster truly was the Lady’s Man at Marshall’s today. He hates his car seat and hates the Ergo (His shrieks were so bad as we entered the store, I thought everyone who walked by or heard him screaming was certain I was a first-time mom!), so I had to hold him facing out while shopping. And boy did he get compliments. Every person (all women) who was shopping nearby stopped to admire his beauty. And I didn’t mind in the least!

Happy Fourth of July to all my readers.  We’ll be back after the holiday with some Fourth of July cheer!

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The Glory Days

June 22, 2013

I grew teary-eyed as we drove home from our morning beach trip today – teary-eyed for a good reason. I couldn’t help but think these are the best days of my life. These are my Glory Days. These are the days that will appear on the timelines of my kids’ Facebook pages when they post pictures on Throwback Thursdays.

Moments like this morning make me wish I could put them in a box to revisit later. Oh how I wish Dumbledore’s Pensieve was real: To place a wand on my head, extract a memory, put it inside a magic bowl and fall inside to relive that moment… if only magic really did exist. Oh to relive every dimply smile, baby coo, imaginative play experience, and kiss and hug!

It is in the ordinary experiences of everyday life where fulfillment exists. It is in my daughter’s happiness as we drove to the beach – she LOVES to sing, especially when excited about something. This morning’s soundtrack did not disappoint.  She sang every little kid song she could pull from her amazing almost 3-year-old memory: ABCs, London Bridge, Itsy Bitsy Spider (the list goes on and on); It is even in my 2-month-old son’s fussy moments, when I pause to sit in a chair and nurse him in a shady spot on a sandy beach as I listen to the waves crest and fall along the shore line. These are the days. The Glory Days.

I’ve thought a lot about how happy I feel to be able to have these moments with my children. I’m putting my teaching career on hold for a year at least to be able to become (a self-described) professional lake walker, playground hopper, supermom to my beautiful children. To be sure, not every moment is one I want to remember, but the good outweighs the bad (even those feisty, temper tantrum, stubborn toddler moments).

These are the days.

In some ways, it’s almost like reliving the Glory Days of my own childhood. My favorite memories live in the summer moments with family – trips to the beach, heading north for a weekend in North Conway, swimming in my cousin’s in-ground swimming pool, staying up late to read books, heat waves, barbeques, fireworks, road trips and being crammed in the backseat of my parents’ Sable (there were three of us kids!).

Now my Glory Days include stolen smiles from my toddler and the balancing act of eating an ice cream cone while holding a baby.

These are the days. The Glory Days. The ordinary, pack up the car, head to the beach with mommy and daddy, eat fried seafood, and end the day slurping melting ice cream while gazing at cows.

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Silly grinning

March 16, 2013

During tonight’s bedtime routine, I found myself drifting to some fun memories of the past day: namely my niece’s third birthday party. It was a fun time. As we were leaving, my 2 ½ year-old daughter said, “I had a lot of fun today playing dress-up, daddy,” as my husband zippered up her coat to head to the car. Her statement was said in her adorable 2-year-old voice, but the simplicity of it struck me; It didn’t take much to make her happy – put out some fun dress-up clothes, add a little frosting to her diet, and it was a day heaven-sent for a toddler.

I must have had quite the goofy grin on my face as I drifted from my reverie to the present when my daughter looked at me and said, “What are you doing, mommy?”  I looked at her and she mimicked the same goofy grin I had on my face.

“Just thinking about you,” I said to her. “You make me happy.”

She giggled, and then finished reading her book, “10 Little Ladybugs,” which she has memorized along with many of her other books.

While our bedtime routine is far from perfect – we deal with delay upon delay, requests for “one more book, please mommy,” and trips to and from the potty – I couldn’t help but think that this is what it’s all about. These simple moments, mundane moments even, that make life worth it. To watch your child, your own flesh and blood, the one who grew inside of you, develop and grow is truly awe-inspiring.

As a society, we struggle with happiness and fulfillment. Life is not easy. But stop and look through the eyes of a child – those simple things are what make us complete. IMG_5448


Egg on your face

March 26, 2012

News flash: Your children can do wrong.

Yes, I know we’d all like to believe our little darlings will never lie to us, will always do their homework on time, and will always follow the rules, but in reality, they won’t. Kids will be kids. They will test the limits again and again.

Oh, and one more thing, it’s OK if they don’t win every competition or game they participate in. Boston.com Moms posted an article today about an Easter egg hunt in Colorado that was canceled due to the misbehavior of the parents. Yes, you read that right. I said parents.

According to the article, too many parents who were determined to make sure their precious peaches found an egg jumped the rope of a children-only hunt. Come on, moms and dads. Can you just chill out? Isn’t the whole point of an egg hunt to look for eggs? And shouldn’t we be teaching our children how to be fair competitors? Not cheaters. Because guess what? When you jump the rope of a children-only egg hunt, you just condoned cheating. Apparently, cheating is now the acceptable norm.

I fear for the future of our society if so-called “helicopter parents,” as the article suggests, are so involved in their children’s’ lives that they ensure they don’t fail even at an egg hunt. We are going to have a generation of self-righteous people who believe they deserve everything on a silver platter without having to do any work.

Can you tell this story irks me?

Now don’t get me wrong. I plan to be fully involved in my child’s life. I can’t wait to join my child’s PTO. I will help her with her homework and cheer her on during her extracurricular activities. But I will also teach her how to lose gracefully. I will teach her that with failure comes strength and that every action has a consequence, both positive and negative.

Finally, I will NEVER condone cheating; not even during an Easter egg hunt.

To all those “helicopter parents” out there, your child is not God’s gift to the world (except for Gianna. She is God’s gift to me and anyone else whose path she crosses!).


The super-crazy-hypochondriac-worried-first time-mother (that’s me)

March 24, 2012

One would think that with this warm weather, cold and flu season would make an early exit. It’s seems everyone I talk to has a sick child. Is it worse this year or am I just much more aware of it now because I have a toddler?

Gi’s had a cough since January. No joke. Granted, the state and intensity of the cough varies (it starts to go away, but then she picks up another bug and it starts again), but she literally has not been cough-free since New Year’s Day.

In fact, last night’s coughing fit prompted a Saturday morning visit to the pediatrician today. Clean bill of health, except for the runny nose, causing her post-nasal drip cough.

However, this most recent pediatrician run has probably landed me on the super-crazy-hypochondriac-worried-first time-mother list.  In the month of February, I was at the pediatrician about once a week.  At one of those visits, she was diagnosed with an ear infection and the other was her 18-month checkup. To my credit, this has been her first visit to the pediatrician since then. Still, I’m sure they think I’m insane.

At every visit, she’s just a little peach. She giggles and chats up a storm with the doctor, and sits quietly as the doctor listens to her lungs and peeks inside her ears. Of course, this makes me one proud mommy. I love to boast gleefully about my well-behaved child. But the doctors, of whom I feel I’ve met just about every single one in the practice (they cover each other for sick visits), must wonder why I even brought her in. If her nose wasn’t running off her face, I definitely wouldn’t have an excuse!

Most of the time, she receives a clean bill of health – lovely sounding lungs, clear ears, and a very relieved, happy momma.  And I always receive the same advice:  elevate her head at night, use a humidifier, and keep her hydrated. (All of which I had been doing anyway).

But then she catches another germ, and the whole song and dance begins again, ultimately ending in a visit to the pediatrician’s after the germ lingers, lingers, lingers.

I swear I’m not a hypochondriac. Little colds and coughs don’t get to me when I have to deal with them, but when it’s my baby, it’s just a different story.

Or maybe I’m just not used to it. She caught only one cold during her first year of life. I nursed her that year, providing her with my own immunity, so I guess now she’s playing catch-up.  Good grief!

~*~*

I’ll end with a little prayer:

Dear Lord,

Thank you for protecting my child and keeping her free from major sicknesses and illnesses. I know I worry about her minor coughs and colds, but I place my concerns in your arms and ask you to heal her and protect her, as you already do. I thank you for her healthy body and I thank you for giving her to me.

AMEN.


Gym daycare: We just aren’t there yet

March 16, 2012

The one time I attempted to leave Gi with the daycare at my gym was an epic failure. She cried and cried and cried. I think she felt abandoned. When I returned from my 20 minute workout to check on her, she was being held by the daycare instructor and her eyes were red and puffy. I felt terrible.

But, I think I’m going to attempt the gym daycare again. Do I dare?

Part of me thinks I should wait until the summer when I plan to make workouts part of my summer schedule. (I have yet to establish a good workout routine while working full-time and it haunts my subconscious ALL THE TIME.) Why put her or myself through the ordeal when I know it’s not going to be part of our routine just yet? But the other part of me really wants to work out this afternoon. It’s a cold and dreary day, which means no walks or trips to the park. What harm would it be for her to play in the Kid Zone for about an hour?

I know my child will be one of those kids who cry when their mom leaves them on the first day of pre-school.

Several hours later…

Had to cut this one short because she woke from her nap. We didn’t end up going to the gym. Ah well.. I will just have to try it out another night. Tomorrow’s Saturday, so I will be attending my weekly Saturday morning spin class. That I don’t miss. The hubby watches her during that one!!